Men, What Do They Know?

Mimi ON Mar 19, 2009 AT 1:04 pm

Gordon Ramsey

Gordon Ramsey

Gordon Ramsey has recently been uncovered as a liar and a charlatan. He was supposed to have played for Glasgow Rangers Football Club. Rangers said he hadn’t, and they should know. He had apparently had a trial for them, but this still doesn’t make him good at football; every boy who’s ever kicked a ball has had a trial for someone or other. Ramsey claims that he never actually said himself that he played for Rangers. The fact was that he had been photographed in what appeared to be a Rangers team photo and the assumption that he was a bona-fide professional spread from there. But the important thing is this: he never set the record straight until he was forced to.

This rumour went on to serve him well. Being a chef is still considered a slightly blousy, flimsy, poncy profession by many, especially men. So to have supposedly been a footballer for a world famous club adds a bit of ‘man of the people’ steel to Chef Ramsey’s persona. When he’s effing and jeffing at any of his male staff they’re thinking, ‘I wouldn’t take this from Worrall-Thompson, and he was no more than a half-decent mixed doubles badminton player, but Ramsey played for Rangers so I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt.’ By the time the truth was uncovered Ramsey’s reputation as the hard-man of the hobs was well established. One wonders whether he was actually covertly behind the perpetuation of the rumour. If so his PR slight-of-hand worked a treat.

Gordon Ramsey Playing Football

Gordon Ramsey Playing Football

Perhaps other stars might think of using a similar method to enhance their status.  Ross Kemp has cottoned on; after being smashed up by his wife he swiftly signed up for a tour of duty in Afghanistan to re-establish his manly credentials. And there was also the success of Ashley and Cheryl Cole in clearing some iffy publicity by getting married to each other. If you remember she was accused of being a racist and he of being a homosexual. So by her marrying a mixed-race man and he marrying a woman of any description, their past negative press was pushed aside.       

Ashley & Cheryl Cole

Ashley & Cheryl Cole

However, to achieve maximum effectiveness, the celebrity should try to pre-empt future PR nuisances. Just think how much hassle Tom Cruise could have saved himself if he’d gone to the trouble of being photographed outside a few gentlemen’s establishments and sperm donation clinics in the 1980s. And how Michael Barrymore must be kicking himself for not revealing in a pre-2001 interview that he couldn’t swim and was scared of water.

There is such a thing as overkill though. Ashley Cole seems to be trying to hammer home his heterosexuality by impregnating other women and rucking with the police. Doth the boy protest too much? Perhaps to pull things in a bit and restore some much needed balance he might consider revealing that before he was a footballer he was a professional chef.

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